Today was going to be a review of the latest blogging experiment (how to grow your blog traffic). I’m going to add another week onto the current experiment with blogger communities. I started late due to sicknesses and the like ravaging the household.
In fact here’s an example of what the week’s been like. These are a few highlights from one stirling 24 hr period.
Child: “Hey mum, here’s something for you!” I’m given a peagreen, recycled paper envelope with a small bulky object inside.
Me: “Wow! I can’t wait to see what it is! I’ll open it when we pick your little sisters up.”
I wonder what it could be? I’m thrilled said child has spent time making something for me, it’s been a long couple of weeks with hubby overseas and it’s stuff like this that makes all the effort so very much worth it. I am freaking rocking this motherhood thing.
I pull over and open the envelope. It’s a tissue covered in globules of dried blood. And a molar. Child now wants it back so they can give it to the tooth fairy. And the envelope. And tissue.
At midnight I get skyped by hubby to say hi. I’m half asleep but begin a riveting tale of domestic life in the past week. The connection disappears 5 seconds into the convo. At least, I think it was the connection.
Me: “Snort. Gurgle. Wah?”
Child: “I threw up on my bed.”
Of course you did child from the top bunk.
Vomitus deposit sorted, I creep back past the baby who is asleep in her cot near my bed. She’s sleeping like a yogi – sitting but folded over with her head between her feet. Breathing? Yup. I leave her to it.
Me: “OMG, what’s happening??”
Child: “Snngirrulqbeeeeeeeria”. Ah, it’s the three year old.
I hold her hand and try to whisk her supportively yet furtively out of the room so yogi babe doesn’t wake.
Child: “Bacgggaruratch”. I dutifully scratch her back, then stand on something plastic and unnecessarily vicious before kneeing a chair, banging my hip on the corner of the desk and headbutting some shelves as I try to find the dolly she’s so loudly desperate to have all of a sudden.
Creep past baby to sleep.
Child: “It’s me.” She’s trying to whisper but I just end up with spittle all over the side of my face.
I escort the 3 year old back to bed again, batch her scrack, goodnight say, baby creep bed sleep.
Me: “Fuggle ma guggle.”
Child: “Hey what time is it? Is it time to get up yet? I don’t know where my watch is.”
Me: “It’s 5 o’clock.”
Child: “Soooo, I can’t get up yet?”
Asleep before the eldest child leaves the room.
Child: “Mumumumummmmummmummumumumumumumumumumumum. MUMUMMMMMUMMMUM. MMMMUMUMUMUMUMUMUMUM!!!!”
I get the baby and bring her into bed for a feed. My eyes flicker for a few seconds then I roll over into a puddle of pee.
So, no. No blog experiment post today.
Yep, that’s one of the kids eating chips off the 60yo carpet in the hallway outside the bathroom. Did I mention the house is over a 100yo and in a state of long-term pre-renovation? Champion mothering moment.